Dinstraction

Where you know you sat down with a nice plate of dinner but several rounds of Candy Crush later your plate is empty and you have no recall of eating.

"I guess the dogs noticed I was dinstracted."

[Credit to Kathy]

Shitiot

A really bad idiot.

"He acted like such a shitiot at the party last night.

Tysoon

A situation arising when far too many things need to happen all at the same time.

"The meetings on her calendar merged into a tysoon on Friday afternoon."

Stunday

The condition that occurs on Sundays where your brain refuses to work properly and all you can really manage to do is stare at things blankly.

"Staying up late on Saturday ensured that the following day would be Stunday."

Pseushi

Artificial sushi.

"She doesn't like fish, so we ordered her some vegetarian pseushi instead."

Preumptive

Making an assumption before it's required.

"He made a preumptive decision before all the facts were in."

Memoronic

An action or a person who is especially memorable for an exceptional depth of stupidity.

"Bob was memoronic at the party on Saturday."

Impetiment

Something that prevents you from properly petting an animal.

"The head cone from the vet is an impetiment for Spot."

Huggle

A hug with a burrowing component reminiscent of snuggling.

"After a lousy day I can always use a good huggle."

Hangry

A state of irrational aggravation that occurs when one is in need of food.

"He gets hangry in the late afternoon if he skips lunch."

Foreverizing

The belief that a temporary solution will somehow become permanent.

"If I take this low-paying job then it'll be all I'll ever have for the rest of my life."

Fangry

The state of being angry enough to bite.

"He was fangry at the guy who kept waving a finger in his face."

Exhaustipated

Too tired to give a shit.

"Constantly having to listen to his conspiracy theories leaves me exhaustipated."

Encyclopleadia

A compendium of all possible excuses.

"I wonder what she'll pull out of her encyclopleadia to explain her screw up this time?"

Drusty

A condition of being both exceptionally dry and dusty simultaneously.

"This wind is sure making the air drusty!"

Confectious

The remarkable state of being contagious, infectious, and sweet all at the same time.

"Her giggle is incredibly confectious."

Celebratty

A person who is both famous and obnoxious simultaneously.

"Paris Hilton is a well-known celebratty."

Boutch

An intense quantity of something arriving at one time.

"The latest boutch of rain increased the risk of flooding in some areas."

Biodivinity

Believing oneself or another to be the incarnation of a god or goddess.

"He has a real sense of his own biodivinity."

Betweenity

The space separating one thing from another.

"If we sit really close together, we can minimize our betweenity."